Of course he's hoping it won't. No one wants to die. Well, OK there have been times in her life Natasha was damn close but this isn't the same. If what could happen happens, Phil is planning on making the ultimate sacrifice. That makes him a bigger hero than even Captain America. She'll realize that. Perhaps too late because much like Tony she's not the one to make the sacrifice play, but Natasha isn't blind or stupid. Stubborn and thinks she knows what's best, sure, but not blind or stupid. Usually.
Then, there he is again. Cool, confident Agent Coulson. It should be a comfort, him being 'himself' again, but somehow it's not. Tasha's seen a weakness in him now she won't be able to forget. She knows Phil's human, of course, but something about what just happened lets her see he's...really real.
She can't address the compliment. The fact he trusts her. She trust him, too. There's one other man on the planet she trusts as much as him, and that man is lost. Truly lost, perhaps forever, in spite of Phil's confidence. Natasha's never been much of an optimist.
When he says needs someone he can trust, that's too much for her to deal with. She's...no that's not what he means. Phil's simply stating his alliances. Of course he is. Why would he mean anything else, especially now? She's not special. she's just...an agent. Just like him.
Not at all like him. He's so much better than she could ever hope to be.
Natasha doesn't say a word. Instead she reaches her hand out and tries to fix his hair. What the hell is she even thinking doing that? A man who wears their hair like that shouldn't be doing any finger running. It messes up more than it fixes.
Natasha tells herself she can't let him go back to work with it mussed like that. It would be proper. It wouldn't be him, but her fingers linger a bit too long, gently stroking though his hair as she notices...everything. Texture, color, warmth, scent. Things that have always been there but went unnoticed by her until this moment. In her touch there's something more tender, something more than simply...trust. It takes her too long to realize what she's doing. Surely he'll notice before she does.
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Usually.Then, there he is again. Cool, confident Agent Coulson. It should be a comfort, him being 'himself' again, but somehow it's not. Tasha's seen a weakness in him now she won't be able to forget. She knows Phil's human, of course, but something about what just happened lets her see he's...really real.
She can't address the compliment. The fact he trusts her. She trust him, too. There's one other man on the planet she trusts as much as him, and that man is lost. Truly lost, perhaps forever, in spite of Phil's confidence. Natasha's never been much of an optimist.
When he says needs someone he can trust, that's too much for her to deal with. She's...no that's not what he means. Phil's simply stating his alliances. Of course he is. Why would he mean anything else, especially now? She's not special. she's just...an agent. Just like him.
Not at all like him. He's so much better than she could ever hope to be.
Natasha doesn't say a word. Instead she reaches her hand out and tries to fix his hair. What the hell is she even thinking doing that? A man who wears their hair like that shouldn't be doing any finger running. It messes up more than it fixes.
Natasha tells herself she can't let him go back to work with it mussed like that. It would be proper. It wouldn't be him, but her fingers linger a bit too long, gently stroking though his hair as she notices...everything. Texture, color, warmth, scent. Things that have always been there but went unnoticed by her until this moment. In her touch there's something more tender, something more than simply...trust. It takes her too long to realize what she's doing. Surely he'll notice before she does.